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Babylon Express - Latest News [Page 2]
Scoop Satire: Where Was Bruce Willis On 911?
Monday, 8 July 2002, 10:51 am | Babylon Express
As the arduous task of clearing the debris and bodies grinds to a halt some 9 months after the unprecedented terrorist attack on the World Trade Centre, American citizens are beginning to ask pointed questions of the Bush administration and US intelligence ... More >>
Scoop Satire: Advert. Executive Gene Discovered
Tuesday, 2 July 2002, 10:20 am | Babylon Express
Edinburgh: After decades of painstaking and often bitterly contentious experimentation, scientists at The Royal College of Executive Genetic Research believe that they have identified the genetic make up of advertising executives (AdExecs) - long regarded ... More >>
Scoop Satire: Captain Ahab Named On CHP List
Friday, 28 June 2002, 10:07 am | Babylon Express
An ex-ship’s captain with a wooden peg-leg and extensive maritime experience was the big surprise when the Christian Coalition announced its party list in Wellington today. More >>
Satire: Computer Addicted To Sitcoms, Playstation
Tuesday, 25 June 2002, 10:03 am | Babylon Express
Paris: France is in an uproar today after the revelation that Le Nausea-2b, the world’s first truly independent artificially intelligent computer, has acquired a taste for US sitcoms and playstation, with indignant editorials from France’s leading newspapers ... More >>
Scoop Satire: English PM Has Hand Cut Off
Thursday, 13 June 2002, 11:14 am | Babylon Express
English Prime Minister Tory Blair’s current tour of the Middle East, his second in an attempt to maintain support for the War on Terrorism coalition, received a literally crippling setback when his right hand was cut off for stealing a chicken from a market ... More >>
Scoop Satire: Tomb To The Unknown Medium-Pacer
Wednesday, 5 June 2002, 10:10 am | Babylon Express
The New Zeal Inc. Cricket Council today unveiled a moving testimonial to the scores of medium pace bowlers slaughtered in various cricketing campaigns during the past century. More >>
Scoop Satire: Englitch Has Shit Kicked Out Of Him
Thursday, 30 May 2002, 10:12 am | Babylon Express
Nationill party leader Bill Englitch had the living shit kicked out of him today as part of a nationwide campaign to raise public awareness of Nationill party leader Bill Englitch. More >>
Satire: Growth "Not Worth The Bother" - Treasury
Tuesday, 28 May 2002, 9:52 am | Babylon Express
A secret Treasury report found down the back of a sofa of a tinny house somewhere in Aro Valley yesterday has caused eyebrows to be rasied after its conclusion suggesting that there's not much point in worrying about growing the New Zeal Inc. economy at ... More >>
ScoopSatire: Innovative US Environmental Scheme
Wednesday, 22 May 2002, 9:38 am | Babylon Express
Scoop is publishing satirical articles from the Babylon Express newspaper. Those easily offended and not often amused should avoid this content. See authors note at the end of this article for more information about the Babylon Express. More >>
Scoop Satire: “Stop me before I run again!”
Tuesday, 21 May 2002, 10:12 am | Babylon Express
A desperate phone-call to the Parliamentary Electoral Office by outcast Reliance leader Jim ‘Jim’ Anderton has increased concerns for his safety as his whereabouts remain unknown this evening. More >>
Babylon Express: Comforting With Intent
Thursday, 16 May 2002, 11:18 am | Babylon Express
A Petone man with no sporting ability was arrested this morning after entering the Starship Troopers Children’s Hospital in Wellington and attempting to comfort children in the Leukaemia ward. More >>
Babylon Express: Capitalism On The March
Wednesday, 1 May 2002, 1:43 pm | Babylon Express
A massive seventeen people surged down the left-hand footpath of Willis Street yesterday in a popular demonstration of support for the economic ideology of Capitalism. More >>
Consultants Advise $400 Hour And Cocaine Habit
Monday, 29 April 2002, 11:19 am | Babylon Express
Being hideously overpaid and speeding like a mirror-happy motherfucker while producing work with absolutely no social worth whatsoever had a long track-record of success in numerous fields. More >>
Babylon Express: Starmarts Breeding Out Of Control
Tuesday, 9 April 2002, 10:42 am | Babylon Express
The discovery by a Mount Cook couple that their kitchen had become a Starmart convenience outlet overnight, employing their 17 year old daughter as a staff assistant, has increased calls for tougher control measures to address what Ministry of Consumption ... More >>
Scoop Satire: International Briefs
Thursday, 31 January 2002, 9:57 am | Babylon Express
Headlines: Blair re-appointed as cheerleader - Sharon Reassures Palestinians - Canada wasn’t last Tuesday - Tragic deaths somewhere More >>
Scoop Satire: Traumatised By Home Poetry Invasion
Thursday, 24 January 2002, 11:27 am | Babylon Express
Wellington: A married couple were said to be in a stable condition after a horrific attack in their Kelburn home last night when a lone poet surprised the two as they were having dinner and then proceeded to recite a selection of his poems at them. More >>
Scoop Satire: Brian-Drain Figures Continue To Rise
Wednesday, 19 December 2001, 1:45 pm | Babylon Express
Latest figures released by the government show that the so-called ‘Brian-drain’ continues unabated with a further 412 Brians leaving for overseas in the last 6 months. More >>
Scoop Satire: Crash To Host ‘Black Breakfast’
Tuesday, 18 December 2001, 10:39 am | Babylon Express
In an attempt to get the New Zeal economy moving in a growth-focused directional capacity, Lord High Inquisitor of the Preserved Bank, Reverend Don Crash, is to host a ‘Black Breakfast’, despite such rituals being banned in most national treasuries, ... More >>
Scoop Satire: Moneychangers Chased from NZRFUKU
Friday, 14 December 2001, 12:09 am | Babylon Express
An excerpt from the Book of Mate: Ch 5, verses 6-16. More >>
Scoop Satire: Karori Expansionist Aims
Tuesday, 11 December 2001, 10:00 am | Babylon Express
The annexation of Wilton is only the first step in a plan to establish a ‘Thousand Year Karori’ according to Northland JP Watford Crustfall. More >>
