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The Corrective Party - Latest News [Page 4]
Cull Flocks of Shrill, Unpleasant Capons
Friday, 14 September 2001, 4:22 pm | The Corrective Party
"Capons appear to be breeding out of control. The Corrective Party is concerned that flocks of the large, unpleasant and stupid birds in question flock across the Tasman in shrill, ill-smelling flocks and emit their inane cries in New South Wales." ... More >>
Captain Peacock’s Members Bill On Spanking
Wednesday, 12 September 2001, 1:38 pm | The Corrective Party
Party Leader Sister Palpitatia BD is unconvinced that Section 59 of the Crimes Act should be amended, other than to exclude non-consenting children “The Corrective Party is concerned that this refugee from a bad seventies sitcom is being untrue ... More >>
Correctives: Only Spank Appreciative Adults!!!
Tuesday, 11 September 2001, 2:13 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party agrees with Mrs. Jenny Whipley of the Nationill Opposition that there should be limits on spanking. However, our approach is different. More >>
Height Restrictions Needed For Immigration Policy
Wednesday, 5 September 2001, 4:36 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party wants to propose an interim solution to the Afghan refugee crisis. We praise our Prime Minister for her good sense and compassion, but there do need to be limits. New Zealand must adopt a sizist immigration policy." Sister ... More >>
Correctives: Forget RU486- What Of K-PIL 666?
Monday, 3 September 2001, 1:45 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party has discovered the cause of the unpleasant condition of Christian Haemorrhoids, which has long held that it can't help itself because it was born that way!!!" said Sister Palpitatia, spokesnun for the Corrective Party ... More >>
Correctives: Haemorrhoids For Branding "Unseemly"
Wednesday, 22 August 2001, 11:44 am | The Corrective Party
"The Christian Haemorrhoids have gone completely over the top with their new-found enthusiasm for ...branding." Sister Palpitatia, Leader of the Corrective Party said today. More >>
Deconstructionists And Strange Textual Practices
Wednesday, 15 August 2001, 2:26 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party agrees with groups calling for the return of phonics to the classroom!!!" said Sister Paedophobia, education spokesnun for New Zealand's only corporal punishment party today. More >>
Attack of the Seventies Homosexual Oops Clones
Wednesday, 8 August 2001, 3:40 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party wishes to express concern about Star Wars II: Attack of the Seventies Homosexuals Oops Clones. We want to know if the rumours about Jarjar Banks are true!!!" said Sister Paedophobia, Child Persecution spokesnun for ... More >>
Save Our Children from Obscene Essene Literature!!
Friday, 27 July 2001, 4:29 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party is shocked, horrified, spindled, folded and mutilated that so-called "christian" groups are calling for the importation and viewing of obscene and Essence papyri that contains nothing but perverted obscene Essene ... More >>
Correctives: Rankin's Choice Of Dress Defended!!!
Tuesday, 10 July 2001, 2:31 pm | The Corrective Party
"Christine Rankin is quite entitled to wear whatever she likes but we do wish to raise some issues of sartorial challenges within the public service!!!" More >>
Brutish Elections And Hairstyle Issues!!!
Monday, 11 June 2001, 12:34 am | The Corrective Party
"What are the lessons of the Brutish elections? Well, basically, the Brutes are not overly into spanking, as our sister Corrective Party failed to pick up the swinging male voter who wants to be disciplined by someone in a strange outfit." ... More >>
Correctives: Nun Violence Runs Amok!!!
Thursday, 7 June 2001, 3:52 pm | The Corrective Party
It is with great [relief] sadness that the Corrective Party (New Zealand Needs Discipline!!!) wishes to announce the unexpected demise of Sister Pontificata of the Stupendous Genuflections. More >>
Lady Thatchula Comes Out Of The Coffin!!!
Tuesday, 5 June 2001, 12:44 am | The Corrective Party
"The Selfservative Party is to be applauded for giving the undead a place in politics!!!" enthused Sister Pontificata of the Stupendous Genuflection today when the Correctives noted the appearance of Lady Thatchula at a fund-raiser for ... More >>
Correctives: Half-Baked Turkeys And Bad Brands!!!
Thursday, 10 May 2001, 9:39 am | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party today confirmed its suspicions about who or what is sponsoring the Christian Haemorrhoids when we noted that the party in question attacked Pizza Hut, a fast-food brand." Sister Vomitoria SM, diet nun, today revealed. More >>
Correctives: Ban Belligerent and Bizarre Babies!!!
Tuesday, 8 May 2001, 3:04 pm | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party are shocked, horrified, spindled, folded and otherwise outraged at the twist that genetic modification has taken in the United States- namely, GM babies. We can now reveal that these babies were not the first of their kind..." ... More >>
Correctives: Irma Should Be Spanked!!!
Friday, 4 May 2001, 10:06 am | The Corrective Party
"The Corrective Party is shocked, horrified, appalled and disgusted at the fact that Irma, a negligent biosecurity evaluator, was responsible for strange and untoward experiments with genetic modification in cows!!!" stated Sister Pontificata ... More >>
Ambulance Officer Case Calls For Compassion
Wednesday, 2 May 2001, 10:41 am | The Corrective Party
Party Leader Graham Capill has called on St John Ambulance to be compassionate toward Ambulance Officer Brendan McInnes, following his sentencing yesterday. More >>
Stupidity Endemic in Fundament Communities!!!
Wednesday, 2 May 2001, 10:36 am | The Corrective Party
"The New Zealand public should be aware that there is an even more insidious designer drug that is now doing the rounds in fundament communities -BAC 182 or "Stupidity." said Sister Raptophilia SM today. More >>
Correctives: Go All The Way With Virgin!!!
Tuesday, 1 May 2001, 9:50 am | The Corrective Party
"As previously indicated by our Agro Nun, the Corrective Party supports the chaste, pure and abstinent Virgin airline, although we aren't sure why the Virgins in question should be blue. We do hope the aircraft cabins aren't al fresco." ... More >>
Correctives: Chop Up Porky Pig!!!
Monday, 30 April 2001, 1:15 pm | The Corrective Party
"Revelations that Porky Pig was let off a foot and mouth cull will horrify many rural New Zealanders." commented Sister Hydroponica, Agro Nun for the Corrective Party, in its latest comments on the Foot in Mouth epidemic in the United Kingdom ... More >>
